Confidence in the Unknown

Moving. Today I moved into my first apartment. My first apartment that I am renting on my own. That I am solely responsible for. And last night I was scared, so scared of the future - but a small part of me that I couldn't identify at first was also confident. Confident in the plans God has for me and trying to find confidence in the unknown. 

Jesus brings me confidence in the unknown. I may not know how my roommates will get along, how work will go, how I will make friends, but I do know (normally, except on those particularly bad days) that God has new grace for me every morning. That his love for me will always overflow. And those phrases may sound cliche or Christianese but as my best friend once told me, sometimes we have to say them because they hold such truth and because we need to hear them so they will sink in. 

After Stephens death, Saul began to destroy the church  and many people were scattered. And {Acts 8:4} "those that had been scattered preached the word wherever they went". This was a time of uncertainty, of constant moving. And yet Philip and others had confidence in the Lord and many people were baptized. 

However, the author also showed what happens when one doesn't have confidence in the Lord. One of the men from his land, Simon the Sorcerer, saw Peter and John laying their hands and having people receive the Holy Spirit, and he offered them money for such ability. Although he saw the great works that God was doing, his confidence lay in his money. I have definitely been guilty of that, or having my confidence lie in myself, in my abilities, my strength. And it is in those places that I feel anxious, stressed, can't sleep, get snippy, grouchy, yell at friends and loved ones, feel far away from God. A self centered confidence does nothing to help you, to grow you, and the disciples explain how our hearts cannot be right for God in such cases because we are {8:23} "full of bitterness and captive to sin". Captive to sin. How convicting is that? When we place our confidence in things not of the Lord we have no chance but falling into sin. 

But luckily God does not forsake us even then. Even when we are captive to sin. No, even then he steps into our path, and ** (Sorry spoiler alert I snuck a peek at the header to chapter 9)** that's exactly what he did for Saul.